The Redemption Run

This past November I attempted my first half marathon. Running a half marathon has been on my bucket list for some time now. I remember one day receiving an email from our SA Country Director about the Soweto Marathon. This was it. I was going to run the half marathon. 21km - 13.1 miles in support of GRS. I would submit myself to 21kms so Grassroot Soccer could continue providing life-saving health education, HIV testing and counseling, and giving youth positive role models. I searched the internet for a training plan, convinced some coworkers, began training, and started fundraising for Grassroot Soccer.  

As race day approached, I felt more prepared and motivated to conquer the 21km than ever. I had some great long training runs leading up to race day but if you haven’t heard the story, race day was not in my favor. We were late to the race and had to run at least 3km, passing the runners, to the start line. While running my drawstring bag broke, I lost the others when I stopped to use the bathroom and hunt for a bag drop, I got stuck in the hundreds of 10k runners and by the time I pushed and shoved to the front, the gunman told me to run because he was about to let the 10k runners go. I took off - frazzled, stressed, overly anxious, and with a broken bag now tied around my neck (I never did find the bag drop). I caught up with an older gentleman also trying to catch up to the pack and outrun the 10k. Looking back, I should stayed pace with him but my ego got me, I wanted to run faster. I needed to find the pack. I turned up my playlist and tried to get lost in the beat, ignoring the signs my body was telling me that I was about to break. I rounded a corner somewhere between the 3km and 4km mark, pulled off to the grass and saw my breakfast.  I was shaking and trying to re-group when the older gentleman I had so eagerly passed, casually ran by and hollered to see if I was alright. I gave him the thumbs up and waved him on. Then a traffic officer walked up the hill. He told me I needed to stop and return to the finish area, get water, and medical attention. I looked at him as if he was crazy - people donated $$ for me to run this race, I trained for weeks for this race. What was he thinking telling me to quit!? Deep down, I wanted to cross that finish line but the officer was right - mentally and now physically I wasn’t going to. Running is so much more than just your legs. The stress and anxiety caused by that morning's events mentally broke me down. I’ve never felt a feeling like that. Walking back to the finish area, I was embarrassed. The 10k, now in full swing, was running opposite me. I was walking the wrong direction, completely defeated. How was I going to tell my friends, family, and coworkers that I didn’t finish? How was I going to tell those you donated to GRS for my run? Shoot, how was I even going to explain it the others who were running, when I was somehow waiting, cheering them on at the finish? In typical Betsy fashion, I tried to avoid the topic at all costs and immediately secretly looked for another half marathon that I could run. 

Fast track to one month later. I am now back home in the US, waiting for some papers in order to apply for my visa. The stress and uncertainty about the future was alive and well. I had talked to Ally, the M&E intern on our team, before I left and we said that we both wanted to run the Two Oceans Half Marathon in Cape Town in April. It is regarded as the most beautiful marathon in the world and hosts thousands of runners for both the half (21km) and an Ultra marathon (56km). Heck, I didn’t know if I would be back in Cape Town but I knew I had to do it and would figure out logistics later. This was it, my redemption run; my run for all those who donated to GRS through my attempt in November; my race to say thank you; my race to push away stress. I woke up at 3am the morning the race went live. It went live at 10am South Africa time and these entries go quick. At 3am I joined the “queu” of runners. The site told me it would be at least 1hr and 20 minutes before I was allowed in. I left the site up, set a new alarm, and went back to sleep, waking back up when it was finally my turn to pay and get my entrance. SUCCESSFUL! Ally and I would be running the Two Oceans! I kept the race on the down-low and elected to forego fundraising to keep the pressure off - I was still in debt to my last donors on my promise to finish. 

Ready to rock 'n roll!

Fast forward to Friday, April 3, 2015. The day before the big race. It is Easter weekend in Cape Town so we have 4 days off of work. Ally and I went to the Two Oceans Expo Friday afternoon to pick up our race packets. We were both feeling nervous about the race as neither of us felt as though we had prepared as we had for Soweto. Ally stays pretty active but I had only run as far as 7miles in the last two months. And I only did that once. The atmosphere and the vibe at the expo was contagious, though. We couldn’t help but get excited for the experience of the most beautiful marathon, the Two Oceans. 16,000 people were running the 21km and 11,000 for the 56km. Now that’s a lot of people, sweat, and positive energy. We had a pasta dinner Friday night, trying our best to cover our lack of training by stuffing ourselves with carbs. The race was set to start at 6:00am the next morning. Determined to actually start with the race this time, we decided to fetch a cab at 4am. Looking back, that may have been excessively early, but it was for the best. We were able to relax at the start line, go to the bathroom, drink water, takes pictures(!!) and for me, flood my body and mind with excitement as more and more runners showed up to run. People were sporting their running club attire, the official race shirt, or other gear, but Ally and I were proudly repping GRS in our #iamafootballer shirts! The music got turned on which means that Ally and I may have been dancing, singing, and ignoring the fact we were about to put our body through something hectic. But who cares. I was pumped and in a state of mind I haven’t experienced in a while. The atmosphere was incredible. I don’t even know how to begin to describe it. This was my redemption run. This was for GRS and the donors from November. Nothing was going to stop me. This time, I was going to cross that finish line even if I needed to crawl. 

It was still dark when we slowly but surely step foot across the start line. I normally run with music. I turn it on the second the gun goes off, but something was different this time. Ally and I both elected to leave our music off for the start. There was something magical and calming about running in the dark, listening to the sound of feet pounding the pavement, and just being in the moment with thousands of other runners. After months and months of overwhelming stress, frustration, uncertainty, and a sense of unsettledness, I finally felt at peace. I would periodically look down at my shirt stamped with "Grassroot Soccer" across the front and think about the amazing staff, coaches, youth, and the important mission that got me to sign up for the Soweto half marathon in the first place. Without them I may have never attempted and would not be running side-by-side Ally in her 2nd half marathon for GRS and in my redemption run. 

As we reached the 1km mark, runners cheered and threw their hands up. The same for 2km and after that cheering squads filled the entire race course cheering and waving signs (my favorite being “Go Dad, run like zombies are chasing you”). Running on the M3 toward Muizenburg, I realized I was going the perfect pace. I wasn’t huffing and puffing to the point where my heart and lungs needed me to slow down and my legs weren’t antsy to speed things up, either. I was in perfect rhythm. I was right where my heart, mind, and body needed to be - in synch. The entire race seemed to shockingly flow just like this as we weaved through the hills and trees with a slight drizzle keeping the sun in check. I was surrounded by runners of all ages, genders, races, and abilities. People were simply putting one foot in the front other, moving toward finishing the 2015 Two Oceans half marathon. I was in a happy place. The 20km sign eventually appeared, the pavement turned to grass, and the finish area came in sight. I began sprinting like I’ve never sprinted before. My high school track coach probably wishes I had had a finishing kick like this back in the day. Five months later, the half marathon was finally....CONQUERED!

You can clearly tell I don't blog often and I would normally never write a post like this but I had to because I am beyond excited to finally publicly send THANK-YOU KILOS to all those who supported GRS back in November. Thank you:

Mom and Dad

Katie M

Kelsey G

Mimi

Caitlin

Anna 
Ali G
Paul

and to all those who did and continue to support in other ways. 

You all are rockstars and helping to change so many lives!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. And remember when I promised to do a little of the below at the finish line of Soweto in your honor? I did, don't you worry. 

Sending lots of thank you's from the finish line!!! 

So many people!! 

In other news: 

**Today, 6 April, marks the International Day of Sport for Development and Peace. Grassroot Soccer is using the power of soccer to empower youth to stop the spread of HIV, become role models in their communities, put an end to GBV, along with so much more. If you are interested in learning more about or supporting our work, please get in touch with me or visit our website. We would love to hear from you! If you are a college student graduating this May or know someone who is, I encourage you to visit this page about our year-long internship program (this is how I got involved with GRS, and LOVED it).